Rewiring the System


I long For Words Together After Words Are Tethered, Trapped, Toast And Tossed.



“Chuang-tzu says:
“The point of a fish trap is the fish: once you’ve got the fish, you can forget the trap. The point of a rabbit snare is the rabbit: once you’ve got the rabbit, you can forget the snare. And the point of a word is the idea: once you’ve got the
idea, you can forget the word. How can I find someone whose forgotten words, so we can have a few words together?”
I long For Words Together After Words Are Tethered, Trapped, and Toast.
I slipped into the pool framed in context, continuing yet another weird
comedy central ‘daily’ show. This is the mystery of azure Chrystal stirred so wildly by ambient emotions that the turmoil held lightly or tightly ether was a woman who spoke NO English only Farsi or is that phrased.? She who looked lost and who felt slightly dizzy. She told the cleaning woman that she was woozy, (how did she communicate her distress while not speaking English is amazing in itself).

I came out of one of the stall showers in my wet skin. A woman brought me a towel. She said I would find eight EMT’s, a stretcher, and all sorts of equipment intensity. The tall men in charge had a lot of great gray hair. It was a trial just to muster energy just enough to get through the room, after the water and soak and my friend’s up and down friendliness.

Life with people!

It is this way ‘The Life With People!’   We  are at the end of the plague, This way and that way,  like the old English did you ever see a lassie go this way and that? A children’s game we play out week after week as hide and seek in flowing or bumpy ways.  This song sung by people to people who with great magnetic longing will complement our ‘relationship’, or not. Nevertheless, there are no guarantees in form.  One amazing party under the constraints of their skin and unshared space might only just know lust and longing. Ever since my friend went east for a rest & reflection, since she and her husband were not using money in a harmonious way she had to make a break to ponder a breakup. She came back filled with comments about my relationship with her. Not on the true and real difficulty but a fantasy projected on a person who would never break. We each have a turn the other cheek person who gives up the unconditional love as prescribed by the great sages of all time.

I wanted to rest and relax after the laps and soaks in the process of washing away the piles of responsibilities I have to shoulder. Breathing deeply after all the agitation did something but as I checked with the inside of my body I still felt the turmoil. I doted on my ritual and delighted just getting there to the pool, finding a close parking space in bringing as much of fun into the path forward out of the watery aquatics as possible. Solidly planted to oversee every detail, the head lifeguard or is she director of aquatics; she stood separating the EMT from the locker room full of woman washing and dressing. I ask the director of aquatics if this ever happened before and she nodded, yes all the time.

It was the first time ‘it’ ever happened when I was wet! And my swim bag, my lovely line rubbery thing from Italy filled with niceties, was whisked somewhere else in all the confusion. I asked the director woman in her fine red uniform if she has seen it. She said that she saw my daughter take it! Off I went so I called Serena.  She said she did move it or take it away anywhere and did not have it. For this woman, and this is true for many women, their swim bags are the bag of goodies. They are all the important grooming creams and brushes, shampoos, rinses of a certain quality in a lime pouch.  My heart dropped thinking that my lovely treats were permanently removed from my beautification that joyful happiness ritual. I left the Y and went to talk to the one person who might have taken my bad with her for safety sakes. This was a shock for me, perhaps a shock for us all.  I drove back to the Y pool from Serena’s and found my things strewn across a surface on a shelf right by the large mirrors, the theatrics wasted my energy and dissipated my restful heart. I came home and sat in bed to watch my fave Friday night, TV show called Numb3rs, but I fell into a complete BLACK deep sleep. When I awoke, I made hot dark (s.f. chocolate co) hot cocoa and allowed the weight of reality, which had settled on my shoulders and eyelashes dissipated with every sweet mouthful. Listen: I am not rereading these raw sentences. The story is slipping off the tips of my fingers and remains unedited.

Do you get free time? Right now, I do not have a social life. With so many loose strings unraveling here in my life and all the questions of what should I do or choose and I am misplacing things and feel the need for fun. But what if the Drama follows me?  What if it is the Blackberry that is unable because of some non doubled over magnetic calling to the cell tower is missing from this incarnation of the ol’ workhorse?  The only way is to have real time real face-to-face contact.  Do you have time for a weekend off to travel here and let me give you a tour? Is this beyond the scope of our chat? If I could watch, you work with the blackberry and learn everything is very easy when people are side by side. Yet I know you have a life and responsibilities and a work office. I guess I feel I need a short change of scene. Are you awake sufficiently to take the jump?

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