Rewiring the System


Inside And Out

Posted in Uncategorized by rewiringangel on November 16, 2010
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Presence of mind happens as the warmth settles on my skin. I feel a gentle velvet touch of golden light on my skin. I am out in this glorious sunny day. I feel that I have to wear velvet in soft delicious chocolate brown. Brown suede straight leg trousers and a matching boat neck three quarter sleeve ‘t’ type shirt. Slung over my shoulders is a mohair cardigan. I am wrapped in comfort both soft and warm.

Today it is really important that I get to my therapy session with the Lymphedema specialist. I am at the ‘other’ medical center in the morning. I have thought about this for three weeks. Yes, no, do I switch and  It is the ‘other’ center that saved my life by giving me the kind of personal attention that detected my cancer early enough that it had not spread to my Lymph System. I want that kind of attention from my medical professionals back, back in my life to ease my heart and mind.

I was very tired after the meeting at the original health care to restore my policy. The Lymph therapy was a delightful target to aim toward in my trusty car. It takes so much energy to drive safely in the city and over the bridge and back. The medical attention at the current care facility is not personal and I am not being followed weekly as is the directive after weeks of radiation. My breast is still cooking from the inside out and I have no information from the Radiation Oncologist who orchestrated the treatment. I am leaving the less caring center though they have secondary gifts. I am going to a real people patient care center where medicine and not wigs and make up are most important. The lovely ‘things’ I now have are uplifting but those are not health care.

The therapist is so good that after I leave the entire system I will try and find a way for her to care for my cancer induced Lymphedema.

I leave the therapist and stop in the lobby to get a coffee to help me have the umph to get home safely. I take the coffee out to my car so I can get on the road before the major traffic . My left arm is shaking because I have difficulty making the ‘holding’ shape with my fingers around the paper cup. I whole arm makes a spatic snap and the coffee flips in two splashes out of the cup and on to my body. It is just warm and not hot so I was not burned just wet all over and smelling of coffee! I think: Wow nice that I am wearing the same color as the spilled liquid!

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