Rewiring the System


Mindfulness Then What


Here I am going out, yet again. This evening I am attending an event at the HUB in San Francisco, a genuine hub of trending Geekdom. Or I am standing in the anti room of a conference hall, or in the lobby of an auditorium, or at a coffee shop, and I hear people talking about Mindfulness! This arrives in many emails I get from such different groups, from Cosmology, science, politics, Artists, The Singularity, coders, foodies and friends about mindfulness. Being Mindful is the buzz word ‘of the day.’

It Is A Trip!

The ‘trip’ seems to be defined as: I have lost myself in a whirlwind and can’t remember who, where, or why I AM.

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Mindfulness, or the process to remember where you are and what you are doing, thinking, feeling is putting the skin in the game. It is the beginning of being present in space at the intersection of the habit of time.

Swami Said Self


“The machine mechanically performs all the movements

its maker wants it to perform, its movements are not those of life.

How can we make the distinction between the living and the dead, then?

In the living there is freedom, there is intelligence;

in the dead all is bound and no freedom is possible, because there is no intelligence.”

———-      ~ Swami Vivekananda

Trauma


Something is tearing at my tender heart, it is a condition of life. I am reading a new book, Trauma, by the noted author Mark Epstein.IMG_20130827_210128

 

I warn you all that the font used is very small so you have to hold the book differently and really concentrate on reading. This book is helping me see as I struggle to move forward. I went to his book tour a few days ago. It was a real insight from a psychological view. His talk was very practical.  Mark spoke from his experiences of eating mindfully as a simple act of not putting more food into your mouth until you have completely finished chewing and swallowing the first bite. My taste buds are singing as they send the good impulses to my brain which then tells my mind/body that good food is fuel for delight.

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Then there is the physical brain, amygdala, over active that is the touchy function of our body mind system. This is the sentnal communicator of stress. One step at a time to turn your attention to the impulses is to turn toward Kindness; Be Kind to yourself.

Ask yourself, what does being kind to myself look like at this intersection. Find what will let you feel you are being Kind To Yourself and Do That Action. Being Kind to yourself is a source of awakening. Kindness is a light on this place you and I are going through, today in the here and now

Our understanding that living with and through a Trauma is NOT Fun. This is a source of connection that allows us, you and I, to care about each other and send our caring support out to all our friends and family.

Last night I painted my toenails. I have not done this in months. I just want to tip toe today with a small caring sparkle.

Emotions are as real as a table, sometimes hard and heavy, “without the hurt the heart is hollow”.

Tough Day


I have made a lot of mistakes in my years on this planet. I come from a first generation American dysfunctional family and married into a Mayflower dysfunctional family. The most painful part is that no matter how hard I tried to break the chain, I did not succeed. Today was a tough day. I can feel my heart breaking. The reality is that all my worries are pointless: If there’s a solution, I have no need to worry. If no solution exists, what’s the point in worrying? Yet because this is family, I feel laden?

My Unhappy story starts back several generations, all of whom are dead.  I am a human being and flawed. I never recognized that I was not using my time with my family wisely. I do not have all the juicy stories. I only have the stories that happened when I was present.

There is a thread from my Grandfather about the Bolsheviks and the Mensheviks.  All sides of my family were liberal and believed that the revolution by the Mugziks, the peasants, to upturn their slave status, was a good thing. The Mensheviks did not win

My parents fled the Bolsheviks and the Russian Revolution. The Revolutionaries came to my Grandfathers house and put a gun to his head. “You have three hours to get as far away from here or I am going to line you up and shoot you all. We want your house and land.” My mother was the oldest of eleven children. My Grandmother, my mother’s mother had the courage to take a few valuables and started walking through Russia, from whatever small town between St Petersburg and Kiev to the closest river. I guess it took a few years until the three surviving children arrived at Ellis Island. My Fathers family came via Vienna because of their mercantile history in the Kosher Foods Business and arrived in New York City in the same year.

The two were so glad to be alive. Their gratitude to America was deep and strong. My father joined the armed forces and they gave him a test and he got a perfect score. You can imagine that was magic for both my father and the country that both saved his life and gave him the possibility for a long and grand future. He became all clearance Intelligence with an office deep underground in a concrete fortress. He is not here to tell me exactly what exact part of what state but he did take me to his office. I have clear visual memory along the concrete halls. His desk was a government issue metal hunk painted a dark green with a rounded corner surface.

He flew the undercover government line just like a Hawk. He was a tough smart man. He was asked to work with the Navaho Nation to set up the Code Whispers.

I remember biting into my first big ripe red tomato on that reservation. The Army guy had a big beige cowboy hat, the tall kind with a widish turned brim bend down and handed it to me, then stood up and smiled. No words passed from him to me. Just his reaching toward me with a lovely Beefsteak. Were did that Jersey tomato come from? Were we in front of a gas station food store in the vast Arizona desert? I turned around in a 360 degree circle taking in the vast reddish dusty earth. My parents green panel truck stood out in the distance. We got back into the truck and drove off down the roadless expanse to the Chiefs small brick house complete with a pointed black tack tar roof. It was built right on the earth. I remember my looking down in surprise since this was the first house I had been in that did not have flooring.

My parents got along beautifully with the Chief and his wife.  My mother gave me the ring which the Chief had given to my father. I have worn it when I was traveling on to Navaho territory 10 years ago when I was crossing the country.  My father worked with the Chief in choosing the members of the tribe who would serve with the Marines and other military forces. Tonight I saw the movie about the service of the Navaho Nation in 1943 Saipan. The part my father played does not appear since he was completely invisible!

R E S P E C T


It’s preposterous how I let things, important projects, important letters, forms, calls, just slide away and out of the window of opportunity. Then I create a personality issue like low self esteem or blame. Letting life flow recklessly along without adequate direction is causing me pain.

One step to mitigate this pain problem is to generate an inner sense of peacefulness.  To Love inside your heart for yourself and gratitude that you are here now investigating the possibility of inner peace changes thinking. Peace, which you can send out as a general cloud of positive thought feeling and a prayer extended to all the people you encounter and all beings around the globe is a great tool for understanding how to feel peace. What does Peace feel like inside your body and mind?

The ‘Gratitude Attitude’, I first encountered in a meaningful way at a TED slash BIL conference in Monterey, California, either in 2005 or 2006. A very productive and gentle man gave a talk about generating gratitude by using the simple act of the manner you use signing your written communication.

Instead of ending with Sincerely, Best Wishes, or Best, which have lost any meaning and have become an ‘off handed’ thing clunking at the end of the conversation, you can choose to place a thought from your heart.

He impressed me with his valor and the importance for using a communication mode which becomes an action, that both woke the writer up to how very lucky they are, and to wish a good heart attitude (emoticon Hearted), to the reader.

He instructed us to try the experiment of signing our letters and texting with a feeling of goodness; With Respect and Gratitude, or With Gratitude and Respect.
I have adopted this ending for my letters. I feel good that I take a moment to allow myself to rest in the idea of just how lucky I am. Gratitude, not only to be breathing but to be living in a time and place where I am truly grateful for being able to write letters.

It’s Alarming How Loud The Silence Screams With No Warning


Color Me Surprised!

We have been misguided, we have been deceived, those of us who have retained a connection with the political oligarchy parading around as ‘democracy’ !  Iraq a Nine Trillion dollar drain on the global economy. If you think this does not effect you look at that pot hole in every street while carrying your bag of grossly expensive groceries while being unable to pay off your college debt.

The Republicans Have Lost Their Minds and the Tea Bags are More Destructive! Who elected these wing nuts? I feel like our leaders have been cut out of MAD Magazine!220px-Paul_Ryan_official_portraitRyan was defeated in the general election. Let’s shout in his big Alfred E. Neuman Ears that His Policies are not wanted!

This MAD mascot, Alfred E. Neuman like Paul Ryan has developed budget plans that propose privatizing Medicare for those currently under the age of 55,funding Medicaid and the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program through block grants to the states,and other changes. Ryan introduced these proposals in his spending plan for the House Budget Committee in April 2011 and in an updated version in March 2012 and again this week. He wants things to change for the WORST for All Americans!

How to sweep the bums out if voting serves no purpose?

Oh My God ! Let’s rise against the push to turn back Progress.

I am now living in heart ache that the global population will be cut by more than 10% in the next 10 years because of Republican anti human being as well as anti middle class practices. My Human Family is becoming a Lost Cause!

Monsanto has placed a rider on some generally desired legislation to be able to engineer foods with no responsibility for the effects on the human systems. Monsanto Is A Monster that Obama has allowed to Thrive while he and his family eat organic food.

The Fracking shoots water under the water table and is poisoning our global water supply so that the privatization of water policy that has been in place since 1974 will charge you for water! Opponents point to potential environmental impacts, including contamination of ground water, risks to air quality, the migration of gases and hydraulic fracturing chemicals to the surface, surface contamination from spills and flowback and the health effects of these.

How did we The People allow this to happen? We stopped being in touch what we think and feel and live out of a inner death.  I hope to help all people stay with themselves as a living Human Being to care about loving themselves sufficiently that they are able to really know self care. The truth is undeniable, unless you figure this out you and the entire global families will be contaminated.

What is the Japanese government telling the people who lived around the nuclear  explosion in March 2011?  On yesterday’s news The government said that the land is being cleaned up! In two years it will be ready for planting rice again. Imagine that! Russia was more honest when they told the people that the area will never be inhabitable again. Imagine with me for a moment that Russia is more honest than Japan!

The Chernobyl disaster is widely considered to have been the worst nuclear power plant accident in history, and is one of only two classified as a level 7 event on the International Nuclear Event Scale (the other being the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear disaster in 2011).  The battle to contain the contamination and avert a greater catastrophe ultimately involved over 500,000 workers and cost an estimated 18 billion rubles. The official Soviet reports long-term effects such as cancers and deformities are still being accounted for.

I have turned to help people connect with their own subtlety so they can be more productive and at inner peace and thus have more chutzpah.I create a center of quiet for people under stress to fill with their stories. It is important to have a chance to listen to yourself by sharing what you are thinking and feeling.

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I work to serve to reteach people how to breathe, which has bigger implications on our daily lives than we imagine. Through short workshops targeted to the individual or group I enable people’s inner core and strength by encourage single-pointed focus.

Do not continue to cover up what you are really feeling. Get involved in returning our country and our family of nations leaders back to serving US!  Obama IS a great failure!

Happy Now? There Is More To Living Than Being Alive: (Coding)


Alexithymia…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHG-9ohsv4Y

Time To Upgrade Your Emotional Operating System And Find Out That There Is More To Living Than The Digital On/Off Codes

Welcome

Find a comfortable position in your seat

and take a slow deep breath.

Look around you and see where you are in the room.

Look on either side of your seat. Say hello to your neighbors on both sides and in front and behind you.

Take a moment to realize that you are safe here.   You are with a trustworthy and knowledgeable person leading this group.

You have chosen to come here because you are interested in Upgrading Your Emotional Operating System with all the implications of this process.

Now let’s start:  Start with a few easy breaths Out and In.  Just listen to the air going in, then a moment of stasis, circulating with grace, then out in an easy release. Allow yourself to feel relaxation as the is air going out.  In with all the energy you need and out to relax. You can close your mouth and just breathe in and out through your nose. (Take a moment to clear your nasal passages if you need to).

As you breathe in feel the energy coming in from the surrounding air as the ‘Oxygen’, that active ingredient in air, brings you energy you need to function . As you breathe out send that oxygen to the places in your body that are in tension. Relax with your out breath, a little bit more with each breath. You are a living being which by your own power of thought, you send the air to go to the places where you are tight. Change the habit of holding tension in your diaphragm.

Find an easy natural rhythm. Find YOUR Natural relaxed Rhythm.  Each one of us here has our own individual drum beat, One Two, or One Two and Three, Or perhaps One Two Three Four.  Find the song in your heart, your rhythm and let out a slow sigh.

Now Breath in and find that you, yourself, are comfortable in your seat. Say Welcome Home and breath out and let yourself relax. Let us take a minute to Just Take in air and let it out and with the out release out a little more tension.

The action of ‘breathing out’ works to remove  the dark particles that are stuck on your insides. Breath out the not needed stuff. There is a science fact about this, but we can put that investigation on hold for the time being, and use this time to breathe in and out.

The next breath you take IN, feel the sense of lightness moving across your forehead and down your arms and legs.  As you breath OUT allow the action of your breath to move down your body and remove the tension in your limbs.

As you breath in and out, doing this easily, you are allowing the crashing of the air molecules within your body to break apart and to circulate the free electron ion into being, bringing you energy.

The next breath you direct your breath-thought to feeling your body on the seat. You are strong and safe and in-touch with your body getting the oxygen it needs to have energy and health in both body and mind.

Feel the Oxygen go to your eyes. Close your eyes and feel all the tension from the usual visual pointed focusing action slip away. As you breath in, allow the curtain of your eyelids to droop down.  Let your eye muscles stop the sizzling seeing pulse. Close your eyes. What do you see on the screen? Take a minute and look at what is projected on the screen of your closed eyelids.

Blink a few times. Now let’s do the clock with our eyeballs. First look as far UP as possible without moving your chin then look as far DOWN, then to Three O’clock and over to Nine O’clock. Then repeat Top, Bottom, Left, Right.  Now start at 12 O’clock and go around, now stopping at 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, and return to 12.  If you want repeat. Now go in reverse from 12 to 11 and so forth back to 12.

Check your breathing. Relax and find your rhythm return.  Close your eyes and feel your body comfortable in your seat.

What season is it today? When you close your eyes what color do you see?  What are the smells of this season? What do you smell now.

Close your eyes again and imagine you are in paradise. Where is your personal paradise? Is it out in nature or in a styling designer living room?

One way to understand what part tension has played in our everyday living is to see that our ability to speak from our inner self has been silenced. From the seat of our emotions we have lost the search engine to the dictionary that would be able to have a conversation, one to one, with ourselves. This is a tragic loss, this loss of diction! So many people are without words for our emotions.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHG-9ohsv4Y

Everyone in this room has experienced “dehumanizing” in one way or another. Both from software or hardware that seems to diminish our ability to know how we feel about our place in the computer world. How can we communicate with others and function effectively in this on off fast paced world. More often than we would like to admit many have an actual deficiency in understanding, processing, and /or describing our emotions.

How do I feel?  Technology seems often to create new boundaries between people. Our industry was supposed to make communication easier and erase old boundaries

Consider this time we share here as a time to tune our individual inner harp at the intersection of Light and Sound. This is a symbol of the representation of the First Singularity as a Circle: Breathing In and Out.

The Meaning Of Life


Man Know Thyself! I have heard this my whole life in one way or another. Where should I start? It is such a Gordian Knot of a puzzle! I have tried looking in the mirror to try and see who I am. I mean as though looking in the mirror would let me see under the boundaries I have constructed to swim with the zillions of people, beings, animals, and such that flow along and cross my path. I was hoping that by looking in the mirror I could see beneath the surface, under my skin and deeper than my muscles, sinus, and cells. Man know thyself is asking me to know what part of my complicated structures of my current self in this my Ira Glass idiom, “This American Life”.

Yesterday during my morning meditation, after years of deep wondering, as I have tried to peel the onion of understanding, one layer at a time I had an Ahh Haa moment. I suddenly saw that all the years of study about Dependant Origination snapped to attention.

The Bhavacakra (Sanskrit; Pali: bhavacakka; Tibetan: srid pa’i ‘khor lo) is a symbolic representation of samsara (or cyclic existence) found on the outside walls of Tibetan Buddhist temples and monasteries in the Indo-Tibet region. In the Mahayana Buddhist tradition, it is believed that the drawing was designed by the Buddha himself in order to help ordinary people understand the Buddhist teachings.
The bhavacakra is popularly referred to as the wheel of life. This term is also translated as wheel of cyclic existence or wheel of becoming.  ~  Wikipedia
The center of the Wheel of Life holds three animals — the snake representing anger, the rooster, greed and the boar, ignorance – on a background of blue, which is as expansive as the vast open cloudless sky.  Blue has, since the end of the Mycenaean culture, been a way to express the vastness of the infinite spacious nature of the human mind. Mycenae was a small fringe settlement dating from around 1600 until 1100 BCE. Most known for the Minoan fine-wear pottery are made from well purified clay of a buff color. The Ancient Grecian Phoenician eyes had not evolved the cones and rods necessary to see Blue. They represented their sky as buff orange.

Surrounding the central animals spinning in a seemingly endless circle of blue are half circles of dark and light areas. On the light side are representations of those seeking to lessen the effects of the poisons and on the dark side are those figures suffering due to the presence and intensity of the three.

I suddenly saw that Man Know Thyself is seeing the actual way that I as an individual express in thought and action my relating out from my personal accumulation of Ignorance. Each person has their own desires and fears which they bounce on to communication with the world. Now again, I feel the vibrating truth of “Don’t Worry, Be Happy!

Serve America: VOTE 2012


Do YOU want to bring back Bolton and the Neo Con Horde?

The End of truth as we have known it Fox News Commentator, John Bolton, would be one of the team. Remember the Group who brought general destruction of our International Stature, (as an exemplary nation), our Privacy, with The Patriot Act leashing out unjust behavior toward all Individuals, and financial debacle world wide for all but the top .001%

John Bolton is a neoconservative!  often equating diplomacy with weakness and indecisiveness. The Neoconservatives want War. That is where they make their money.

There is a conflict between the very rich and the very, very rich with those stratospheric billionaires who are purchasing Governments.

I remembering being a member of a Political Theater Group who dressed up and went to stump speeches called the Billionaires For Bush. Where did I put my extra stickers?

Billionaires for Bush is a culture jamming political street theater organization that satirically purports to support George W. Bush for those activities which are perceived to benefit corporations and the super-wealthy. A secret New York City Police Department intelligence report based on undercover surveillance of the group in 2003 and 2004 in advance of the 2004 Republican National Convention in New York City, described the Billionaires as “an activist group forged as a mockery of the current president and political policies.

They wore conservative jackets and ties (but no bowler hats, etc.) and carried innocuous signs such as “Run, Steve, Run.” Happy to have grass-roots support, the Forbes handlers (who believed the Billionaires were students from a nearby business school) placed them in front of the cameras, very near to the podium from which Forbes was speaking. However, each of their signs had another sign behind it. And behind their banner (which read “Forbes 2000: He wants YOU to win”) was another banner, waiting. At the most dramatic moment of his announcement, the Billionaires flipped their signs, and pulled away the large banner to reveal one which read: “Billionaires for Forbes: Because Inequality isn’t Growing Fast Enough.” The Billionaires started chanting “Let workers pay the tax so investors can relax!” and other slogans. Forbes and his handlers were completely thrown off, a little tussle ensued, and the Billionaires were pushed off to the side away from the cameras. Not wanting to miss the action, half the TV crews left the Forbes speech to cover the Billionaires. The action got lots of coverage.

John Bolton was pushed into the United Nations Position by the Right Wing. Bolton resigned before the end of his term because he was unlikely to win confirmation from the balanced Senate.

The Romney supporters want to remove The United States from it’s prominent place within the family of global community in The United Nations. Beware Citizens!

Yesterday, I heard a conversation wafting above the high fence around the University skateboard park. I live 25 yards from the sound of the rolling wheels and happy masculine conversation. It is a special atmosphere where skateboarders’ can escape being watched and recharge. It was not usual to hear political conversation. It happened on that day that one young man said to the dozen or so assembled: If you do not Vote, it is a Vote for Romney. Take Care you know what you are doing. He insisted that his friends Get out and VOTE. Go to your local City Hall and vote early. This way you can be assured that Your Vote Will Be Counted.

True Stability


Yes, there is a pointer of thought. Who among us spends more than an occasional moment or gives much thought to just where Thoughts  come from?  Where do we each place the pointer of our thinking mechanism? Finding this takes real mental effort and emotional control. The difficulty is finding the tip of a thought. Where in your brain and consciousness do thoughts start?  Some writers and thinkers have labeled that point a space in time. I once heard a man say that it is a GAP where choice functions.  He used the word GAP to give some idea of thinking as a stream of action that has a muscular structure and can be exercised to be in charge of the development of strength and stability of Mind. The vagaries of life happen though I choose the direction to tell my ‘thought’ where and how to travel.

It is like the difference of a cozy relationship and a marriage. How do people make the choice to do more than just visit with one another as humans who are dating and risk being together in cohabitation both physically and financially? The choice might be an emotional space we have all experienced at one level or another. Emotions are easier to understand than thinking.

When I drive, I am calm. It took many years of working on the space between the originating thought and a response either physical as accelerating or breaking or the emotional response which rises my blood pressure or an expression such as honking .

True stability is poise in the GAP. It is an ease with the short view of what is good right here and now in this moment in this lifetime and the long view of how this moment will attract and construct the future of individuals, Nations, and our very planet in the family of stars.

Being moderate and  trying to live simply certainly gives me a large screen to view the display of my actions and reactions. I am a beginner.

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