Rewiring the System


If a thought grows out of the workings of the brain,  then a Conviction is the guidance that grows out of the Heart. Integrity is a conviction of self esteem working with in a family and out to a community and our Globe, this blue pearl.

It is not a clever argument, a conviction is a firm belief.  I believe that most often it is not verbally sharing a belief but the very living integrity that moves others into action. As a parent I had first hand proof that it was the way I moved, spoke, treated others, and lived my every day life that was the great teacher. It is my actions that I impressed on those under my care how to behave both in times of joy and those many times of struggle.


Just a few days ago while I was leaving an appointment I was told that she was glad I talked with her since I always leave her with a smile on her face! That could be none other than the conviction of joy in my heart that rounds out the sounds my words try to convey.

Conviction is a seed for understanding the infinite amount of time and energy each of us have to complete the thought, contained in a word and that string of words that brings people close to one another. The evidence is in the action that always speaks louder than words, thought without words we would all be miming with painted faces and stripped leggings.

I remember with great fondness the time I drove my dearest teacher and monks around on their errands. I would sometimes have a group of monks in my car on the way to the grocery store. There were times when visiting monks came to see my teacher and I was asked to take them window shopping. Most often they wanted to go to the poor part of town and look around in the thrift stores in that community. My teacher liked to go to great malls in various towns around where he lived.  People who view their lives as Spending Time, learn by watching the way true meditating servants of the common good live, is a great adventure and gift in itself. This also taught me to watch how people mirror my behavior.

There were no words shared but the conviction that was taught, is to always want to see every part of the world with no fear.  I walked with conviction born out of inner integrity where few choose to shop.

In fact, one day, long ago I was in such a very thrifty thrift store with three or four travelers when I found a big packing box of High Loft European Goose Down ‘Famous Label’ with the embossed coat of arms,  (Ralph Lauren), king size pillows for fifteen dollars each! What a great surprise. The next day I went to Bloomingdales and found the regular size of this same pillow for three hundred dollars each! I guess it was not being afraid to window shop deep within the wrong side of the tracks! Probably these pillows were not sold earlier because the usual clients did not know what they were or their exorbitant usual cost.

The conviction in my heart is: we are all worthy people! No matter how much stuff we have or how much it cost.



I am held in the ice grip of my past pain, too. You and I all have an ice chest in our hearts.  It is a human condition to slip into the watery construction coalesced in Cold! I feel the chill down to the tips of my fingers, though I know in my heart this inability to move is a passing event held on a sting prison of time. Cold Time!

I am feeling the global environmental events in my mind, my heart, in the core of my bones, and the puppet jangling of every fiber of my nerves.

El Paso Texas has not had any rain for over 110 days. This is the no moisture of Shiva coalescing with Vishnu in a union of epic proportions. Hot Black Blanket of air sandwiched with a light cool pushy pillow that wants to wrap a down turn to bring the coolness to the rightful place in the strata of atmosphere. I feel the intense electricity of the circulating light and dark. The hairs on my skin are charged and stand not from an inner quality but from the surrounding richly charged electron flow.

There are people who can make really transformative art out of  Global warming. Beauty is always transformative. I feel the disasters that are happening around the world are related to Mans misuse of our resources. Mother Nature is rebelling. It is time to rethink actions and construct every move and all thoughts as beautiful from the inner resource palet Prokofiev of movement sound while being beautifully decorated and presented. If you do not have the Russian sense you can choose a cool Icelandic Vodka in a bar constructed entirely of ICE or you might singe the Blues with Miles and Joe Williams.
This is amazing and beautiful and tares tears at our common emotion and response of loss. I am held in the ice grip of my past pain too. The sun dapples on the thin leaves of health and joy with delicacy. This verdant lightness is our, each one in the human family and the four footed friends the soft sweet inner reality. A time can come when this sweet self is on trial. The trial can go on for a very long time or with the help of a companion suffer come to a swift conclusion. Then the two halves separated in some virtual vestal event come together to complete the uniting, complete the soul

A friend sends me these words to ease my heart:  May the stars carry away your sadness; flowers fill your heart with beauty; hope forever wipe away your tears; and silence make you strong. There is no other creative energy that can do more with less than the Great Creative Silence. I try and practice resting my brain, mind and consciousness by letting the thoughts about what was or what I should do next and enjoy being ME.